Posted by: Angie | October 21, 2009

Doing some soul searching

After finally talking with my boss about some issues I was having at work, I thought it was time to take an inventory of the issues I may or may not have at home. 

One being always wanting a clean house, but never having the energy to actually clean it after a long day at work and taking care of Little A and pets.  I’m good at managing my time while at work, but when I get home, I just can’t seem to do it at home.  Like right now, instead of sitting here in front of the computer and TV, I should be starting the laundry and doing the pile of dishes. 

Two, I let too many things bother me.  I’m pretty good at letting some things go, like the family drama, but other things just seem to stick with me.  For example, Monday was the worst day I’ve had in weeks.  It all started with a nightmare about someone who was trying to kill me chased me up a large rather skinny building.  While I was at the top of the building, I pondered how I was going to kill myself since I didn’t want this guy to kill me.  Then I lost my purse, put on two different pairs of shoes, and was a half-hour late to work.  I let these events determine the course of my day which is completely wrong.  I need to just let things go.

Third, and final for today, is I need to snap out of depressed states quicker.  Most people with chronic diseases are depressed because the medication, the stress, anxiety, and frustrations that come with these diseases can be a bit much sometimes.  While I have some limitations to what I can do, I can’t let these limitations rule my life.  I need to continually strive for acceptance of my arthritis and why it has changed my life.


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